What could I do differently?

Well, this question always brings in the dilemma of life where if we go back and change bits of our past, we’d also be changing up the present pieces of our being and the question then becomes, “Do you want to change who you have become as a person?“

Anywho! The one thing I could have, should have, would have, done differently is nurturing faith in myself right from the dizzy adolescent times. Or as I like to put it, “Be Your Own Sunshine“.

What it means to “Be Your Own Sunshine”?

1. Listen to comments, suggestions, advice, responses. Listen. Do not jump into action just yet. Or thoughts even. Only listen.
2. Appreciate the concern and care. You don’t need to explain yourself. You definitely don’t need to defend your choices, neither in action nor in words. Live and let live.
3. Acknowledge the mind-space you are in, the health you are blessed with, the life and circumstances you can be grateful for. Make the best of it all. Not everything needs to be dissected into strengths or weaknesses. Most of it just is. It is for you to take it as it is and make it work.
4. Find happiness in the efforts you put in. As they say, you cannot shame yourself into change but you can love yourself into evolution. Let the joy of today’s efforts, no matter how minuscule they seem in comparison to expectations and stories, drive you to learn better and do better in the coming days.
5. Choose Faith over Fear. As cliché as it sounds, trust the process. You do not need to know it all right now. You will never know it all. And that’s alright. You only get to trust your actions, so long as they come from a place of core values and not ego, and have faith in the power of synchronicity.

What “Be Your Own Sunshine” does not mean?

1. Assuming that you can ever know it all. This is as impractical as thinking that sometime in the near distant future you will likely know it all. That consolation of one text book being the et all of all you need to know about one subject is only meant to make childhood fun.
2. Presuming that everyone out there is jealous and wants to see you fail. Truth is, no one cares. Like, for real. Whether you prove your instincts and vision to be true with your dedicated efforts, fail to do so, or need to reroute a thousand times, no one cares either way.
3. Expecting to reach the zenith of this “ideal me” journey. Every life goal down this road is only a mirage and not the horizon. The sooner we come to accept it, the happier we can be.

As the amazing Maya Angelou once said, “Be a Rainbow in Someone Else’s Cloud.” I guess, the starting point is to be your own sunshine.

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